A lesson in love.


I have always had this problem.

I’ve always thought differently from everyone around me. I usually don’t voice these thoughts because thinking differently in the south, usually means exile. And that was scary.

But this weekend, I had a thought – if I don’t say something, who will?

For too long in Christianity, we have stood up for only a certain type of marginalized group of human beings. We pick and choose which “hurting” people are deserving of Christ’s love.

Orphans? Widows? Sure.

Gay people? Transgender people?  They don’t deserve Christ’s love, they don’t deserve my love.

It’s confusing to me to see people proclaim the Gospel as the renewing and beautiful truth one day and then claim “God hates fags” the next day.

And if it’s confusing to me, I can’t even imagine how the LGBTQ community feels.

Not understanding someone’s lifestyle choices does not give you the right to degrade them, hurt them, and treat them with hate.

We are all sinful. We are all broken.

You are not better than them. You don’t get to choose what makes a human worthy, they are a living breathing human being which makes them worthy. Worthy of love. Love them for them. Not so you can convert them or change them or make them more like you.

Take a lesson from Jesus and love them unconditionally.

Hear me – I am not asking you to agree with the LGBTQ community’s lives. I am not asking you to stand in a PRIDE parade or hold a sign.

But just because something is foreign to you and unknown, that doesn’t justify a “you are not real to me, so I’m going to treat you as an evil human being.”

The way you treat people who disagree with you says a lot more about you, than the disagreement. 

I know for a straight, conservative, evangelical person, it’s pretty hard to understand how anyone could be a gender not designated to them by their biological sex or how they could be attracted to someone of the same sex.

I totally get how that may make you uncomfortable.

But you do not get to change the word of God to your opinions or because some people make you feel uncomfortable. I am so glad that my life wasn’t too uncomfortable for Jesus, thank goodness He didn’t base His love for me on how well he understands my sin when He was sinless.

“The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” Mark 12:31

I’ve watched this happen in my own life. My sister dated a girl 5 years ago and all the sudden, all hell broke loose. She was excommunicated from many people’s lives, treated as a second class human being, and because people didn’t understand her, they chose to decide things about her life.

I’m crying as I write this because in this instance, all of it became real for me. At the time, I hadn’t known any gay people and I had never seen this happen in my own life. I had never watched people turn from loving to cold, from open to closed, from sweet to sinister, in just a couple months, everything changed.

I watched someone I loved, be treated as unworthy of love, unworthy of compassion, and unworthy of grace.

For many of you, it’s easy to speak out against LGBTQ people because you don’t see them as real. You haven’t watched their battle, you don’t know their hearts, and you don’t seem them struggle.

But I watched her struggle. I had to watch her fall apart as the people who were supposed to love her unconditionally, walked away from her life. She was burned and scarred by people who said they would never leave.

She was abandoned with scars left by Christians who preached the message of love by day, and screamed the siren of hate by night. 

It was at this moment in my life that I learned that it’s easy for people to preach about things they don’t understand all while doing whatever they wanted behind closed doors. Those people preaching against homosexuality were the same people living lives of deceit, scandal, and lies behind closed doors. It didn’t make sense to me.

Life as an LGBTQ person must be heartbreaking. Feeling as if you are finally living as you are supposed to be and everyone treats you as if you don’t deserve to live.

I don’t know. I don’t see it, I guess. I don’t see where we, as sinful human beings, get to make decisions about others.

The only decision we should have over other people’s lives is if we get to bear hug them or regular hug them. Just love the freaking heck out of them.

I hope that we will all be a better picture of Jesus today. 

I hope that our differences will not be the defining factor of the way we love someone.

And I hope that we will always remember that disagreement doesn’t mean hate.

There are 7 billion people in the world. We are all not going to agree or get a long. 

We can do better. Love is better. Choose love today. 

“Blessed are the merciful,
    for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
    for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
    for they will be called children of God.” Matthew 5: 7-9

Show mercy, be pure in your heart and actions, make peace today.



P.S. – I am incredibly aware that many of you may not agree with what I have said here today. While we do not agree or understand one another, my hope and prayer is that you will deal with me with love and come to me privately to deal with the matter. Life is hard and confusing and tough, let’s not make it harder by treating one another with malice.

For those who don’t know – LGBTQ stands for: LGBTQ stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer(and/or questioning) individuals/identities.


3 thoughts on “A lesson in love.

  1. What a great love you have for your sister and others Crissy! Such a hard subject, I don’t know the answers either but I do know loving others is a Command and one we should Not take lightly considering our own sinful, unrepentant hearts! thank you for your thoughts!❤

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